He was my love, my life and everything I had ever dreamt of yet I lost him due to my negligent decision.
We were in a relationship from past 5 years and in these 5 years we had felt very emotion be it happiness, anger, sadness or jealousy. No matter how mad he was or how he always forgot little things, I always loved him.
He was such a nice guy that every girl dreams of. He would always made me laugh. He always loved me and pampered me. He never lied to me and never got angry at me. I know I annoyed him a lot but still he was very calm. He understood my silence. Yeah sometimes he didn’t paid attention to his words and that hurt me but it was always unintentionally. It was his nature and I didn’t wanted it to change. It killed me from inside to see him upset.
I always knew that he wanted to marry me. It’s not that I didn’t wanted to marry him but I knew my family wouldn’t accept our relationship. He talked several times about it that he will talk to my parents about our relationship but I always resisted and told him that they would kill me on listening to this. Hearing this, he always tried to made me understand how important was I for him. I knew I meant a lot for him but that fear always overcame my senses. At last he would stop telling me and it made me feel guilty.
But that day I can never forget when I took the extreme step of my life and shattered his heart into pieces. I know I didn’t do right but it was necessary.
It was our 6th valentine together. I started getting idea about what was he planning to do. We went to a park well famous for lovers. There were others couples also. Some with their hands tangled with each other, others busy in something more. And then there were some couples who were just together living the moment.
We started moving through the center of park while we held each other’s hand when he suddenly stopped. I looked at his face. He went to his knee at once and took the rose hidden presumably behind his back.
“Aditi, I may not be the best lover but I promise to give you every ounce of my love that’s remaining inside me for the rest of our life. I want us to be officially one. Will you marry me?” he said in one go with his slightly high-pitched signature voice that didn’t had any heaviness.
His face got red. I knew he was a shy guy and thus it took him a lot of confidence to propose me for marriage in front of everyone present there. I had always dreamed of a proposal like this.
I looked at the rose and was taken aback that it had a diamond ring inside that was shining. How did he fitted that ring inside the rose? I was surprised. I kept looking at his face. Everyone was looking at us and presumably thinking that I would accept it but that wasn’t the case.
“No, Puneet. I can’t accept it. You know my family would never approve of this relationship so why did you even proposed me like this. This relationship was going smoothly and we both knew we had to separate soon still you did this. And I think now it’s better to get separated as I wouldn’t be able to take it anymore. My parents are already searching for a boy. Please understand me. I have to go home now. Bye.” I said with tears in my eyes
I said all of this to him without looking at him. I couldn’t make eye contact with him. I looked around and everyone was watching us with shock. I looked at his face at last. They were ridden of any emotion. Only tears were there in his eyes. I knew his heart was crying out loud. He looked totally shocked. I just started walking out of the park. Everyone present there was looking at me like I had done some crime and in fact I had. I had killed my love’s heart, emotions, feelings and directly killed him.
I never thought I would take this step cause I wasn’t strong enough to take this step but I don’t know how I took it. How I said those words to him.
While going back to home, I kept crying in the bus. Tissues seemed to increase the intensity of my tears. I was thinking what a mess I created and I shouldn’t have said so much to him in that way. I was regretting my decision. I was feeling like I should have gone to my parents and told them about our relationship. I was remembering his words “we love each other and we should talk to your parents about our future”. These were his words he always said. His emotionless face that I had seen last time and too because of me was again and again coming in my mind. I was feeling uncomfortable. My heartbeat was on the rise. I felt something bad had happened to Puneet but wasn’t sure why it was so. I just sidelined my negative thoughts and started taking to myself that he was fine. It was then my phone started ringing. It was a call from him. I smiled while still with tears in my eyes. I felt happy that yeah he is ok and he called me.
“Hello, Puneet. Where are you? Are you fine?” I said
What I heard from the other side was earth shattering to me. My phone just fell from my hands on my lap. The voice was totally unrecognizable.
“Hello..Hello..Listen this man was lying here in the middle of road in a pool of blood. He met with an accident. I am with him in the ambulance now.He is very serious. Please reach the nearest hospital fast.he showed me your number on his phone before losing his consciousness.”
And the call was cut……………….
I never knew how that accident happened, I never knew how he felt, I never knew what happened to that rose and the ring in it. I never got to knew anything cause I could never meet him again in this world…