As he stood in the balcony with his right hand on the black colored iron fence and a burning cigarette in the fingers of his left hand, his mind and heart battled each other. The night sky devoid of the moon complemented his conditions rather painfully.
His heart still felt the love for her strongly while his mind forced that love to not come and show up.
“Why are you talking to her rudely?” his heart asked
“You really want an answer?” his mind counter questioned
“Obviously.” his heart replied
“You don’t know what she did?” his mind asked
“But it wasn’t in her hand. She was forced to this.” his heart replied supporting her
“What she did was wrong and nothing can be done now. I am angry with her and I am going to talk rudely with her.” his mind replied
“She doesn’t deserves this. You’re doing wrong.” his heart raised the opinion strongly
“Even I don’t deserved all this pain and all this forced nicotine. What wrong did I do? Stop having a soft corner for her. She’s gone and won’t return. Be practical. I can’t allow to be just friends with her, knowing she meant even more than a lover at one point.” his mind countered much strongly
He smoked the first puff and the nicotine quickly entered his bloodstream. His mind and heart’s battle died with that first puff.
It was so ironic that the person who hated cigarette his whole life now took the help of cigarette to shut down this battle every time it happened.
And it was the mind that won the battle everytime. He could do nothing to create peace between them. He knew his mind was hurting her but then just like she had no control over her decision, even he had no control over this rude behaviour of his.
Maybe he was too hurt from inside.
Maybe he hadn’t encountered this much hurt before.
Maybe she didn’t know the extent of the excruciating pain he was encountering…
Image credits – Medical stop